I finally have figured out what i wanna do in 2011.
I wanna learn how to cook 
In about two weeks I’ll be tuning 23 and so far I don’t know how to cook anything besides water. And let me make it clear: that’s only in our kitchen water boiler. Don’t ask me to do that shiz on a stove.
Yes, I can’t do squash in the kitchen. And when my mom for some reason decides not to cook a day I have two options: go to- the nearest fast food restaurant to stuff myself or starve to dead for a day.
It’s actually not just me. Most men in my family can’t cook. Okay let me translate that: my dad can’t cook either, so that shouldn’t be a big surprise that I’m the same. If I act all sobby-faced I can maybe convince my mom to bake me an egg… which is another thing I can’t do, but other than that I have not much choice left. Oh boohoo, like you’re perfect!!
I remember in October when I was in The Netherlands and I was craving a baked egg for breakfast I had to ask my 9 year old cousin to bake it for me, while I stood helplessly by the side. My 16 year old cousin made me macaroni another day and to me that was like some wakeup call to learn to prepare my own daily meal. After all isn’t it my life plan to get out of the house as soon as I possibly can? And unless I become some multi-millionaire fast (or if I marry one ASAP) and hire an entire army of professional chefs to prepare me fancy appetizer and over-the-top main courses, I’d better learn how to put a plate on the table and fill my stomach. After all, anorexia is so 2005, not?
Wanna know just how bad things are? I can’t even “cook” rice correctly; basically all you have to do is add water and plug in the cooker, right? WRONG! My rice is either too dry or too wet. Oh it gets worse. Even a simply task like turning on the stove can be life threatening to me.
It’s pathetic I know!!! But I make up for it in other areas of creativity. I promise.
Soooooooooooo…. let’s get down to business.
This is my open casting call for the perfect teacher(s). I have a lot of friends that claim to be the real iron chefs in the world so this is your chance to have your first apprentice. The challenge: can you turn this absolute kitchen n00b in a somewhat-sorry-excuse-of-a-cook?
After all, it would be cool to learn to put dishes like Rigatoni con la Pajata, Tortelloni ricotta and spinaci, Crostini con condimenti misti, Gratin dauphinois or Salade Niçoise on the table. Half of those dishes I can’t even pronounce, so let’s not even start talking about preparing them!
Actually I don’t even know what any of those are…. I just googled them. LOL
Okay seriously now. I’m not that interested in preparing traditional Surinamese food. To eat it, yes (for the most part), but I’d rather learn to prepare meals that aren’t “every day meals”. Gosh we already have enough of the experts in those meals. Time for the experimentalists to rise.
So this is your chance. You can either help me or at least point me in the right direction. And in 2012 we’ll see how far I’ve come. I’ll be eternally gratefully and there is even payment involved. That’s if you take meals as payments or you’ll have to wait for me to discover that undiscovered-underground-railroad.
